Up to 500,000 uts (AKA youths, like in the movie My Cousin Vinni, “Da two uts never stole no car.) rioted across France over the weekend protesting a new law that allows employers to fire worker during the first two years of their employment. French defense ministers were feverishly working out surrender terms.
You gotta wonder what the law was before. Pierre the slacker shows up at a construction site and is hired to shovel debris into a truck. Pierre spends the day yaking on his cell phone, drinking beer and smoking cigarettes but he can’t be fired? The debris has yet to be moved so the construction firm hires another ut who takes up a game of rock-paper-scissors with the first dude. So the construction firm hires yet another ut and, the three play hacky sacky all day. The next thing you know the construction firm has hired 10 uts to move debris but has only created an all day party of 10 knuckleheads that only add to the pile of debris that requires moving.
So faced with the very real possibility of having to turn in a days work for a days pay, Pierre has taken to the street in protest. Ironically, Pierre has taken to smashing some of the very stores that would, were they not destroyed, offer employment opportunities. Employers are carefully watching the crowd in the hopes of hiring the most energetic among the rioters. One shop owner watching the riots opined, “If dees uts had dis much energy at work, we’d have no problem.”
The French defense ministry is looking into using rioting as a training tool for new recruits. One French general was heard to say of the rioters, “Ahh, if only we could get our soldiers to fight with such élan.”
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