Pardon Libby; it'll make for great TV

The best thing President Bush could do right now is to pardon Scooter Libby completely, fully and unequivocally. In doing so, the president could claim that Libby did nothing wrong. Then he could note that it was the Uncle Fester look alike at the State Department, Richard the Dick Armitage, who gave up brave Valerie Plame; which in itself turns out not to be crime, but is what got the whole investigation started. Then for good measure, he could note that Special Ed Prosecutor Patty Fitzfong spent millions of dollars asking questions he already knew the answers to investigating an event that he knew wasn’t a crime. Fitzfong spent three years hunting elephants and all he bagged was a flattened squirrel he found in the middle of the road on the way home.

Ahhhhhh but Lex, we need help from the DemoRAT congress to get some stuff done in the last year and half of Bush’s term. Pardoning Libby will poison the well. Look, the well was poisoned when DemoRATS forked 2 tons of manure down it two days after the 2000 election. DemoRATS have continued to poison the well everyday since they first claimed that Al Oscar Gore should be president because they were too stupid to read a ballot with big black arrows pointing to a candidate’s name. The well IS already poisoned.

Another reason to pardon Libby is the best. Libby deserves to be pardoned. But in doing so, Bush will so anger the Libs many are sure to hurl themselves from tall buildings in protest. Ten seconds after the Libby verdict, Scrawny Harry rushed to microphone to demand that Bush promise not to pardon Libby. That would be Article II, Section 2 of the constitution where it says, the president “shall have Power to Grant Reprieves and Pardons for Offences against the United States, except in Cases of Impeachment and when so directed by Scrawny Harry, master of the crooked land deal.” It would be absolutely hilarious to watch the uncontrolled anger of DemoRATS, Maher, Olbermann, Mathews and their propaganda arm (a.k.a the MSM) as that anger sends them over the edge.

Then there is the delusional lying gas-bag, Joe king of the frog march Wilson. This dishonest pant load is already clearly unstable. I think he actually believes the lies he has told. A full pardon of Scooter Libby is likely to send this double-dealing weasel running down the street naked, smearing orange Jell-O over his soft flabby body. Later, police would find Wilson hugging a naked Dan Rather smeared in lime Jell-O under a hibiscus bush asking each other, “What’s the frequency Bill?”

Please, Mr. President, pardon Scooter Libby now. It’s the right thing to do. Besides, it’ll just make for damn good TV for a couple of days.