Senator Wedge utters the "I" word

You Blockhead Charlie Hagel has suggested that President Bush may be impeached because “[he] will not respond to what the people of this country are saying about Iraq or anything else” and “[he doesn’t] care what Congress does, [he’s] going to proceed.” Senator Blockhead is one of the dimmest of the 500 or so low watt bulbs that illuminate our congress. So when the Blockhead says something, Lex’s first impulse is to ignore it as idiotic gasbaggery from idiotic gasbag. But then Senator Blockhead manages to say something so stupid, even for him, that it must be commented upon.

First, Senator Blockhead ought to read Article II of our constitution (Executive Branch). There’s this pesky little clause in there that tells us the term of the President of the United States lasts four years. There is nary a word about removing a president because his policies are unpopular with the masses; nothing about the president having to maintain a 50% or better public approval rating. Neither is there a word in Article I (Legislative Branch) or Article II indicating that a president may be removed from office because he is unpopular with congress. That it seems to me, would only add to his credibility.

So while Senator Blockhead amazingly stumbles upon the correct mechanism for removing a president from office – impeachment – he is unsurprisingly clueless about what offers constitutional grounds for triggering that mechanism. Yo Charlie, making difficult, unpopular or even wrong decisions within the constitutional framework does not constitute a high crime or a misdemeanor. We do not have a parliamentary system where congress gets to bring down a government with a vote of no confidence. We do not remove presidents when their popularity in the polls dips below a certain number. They serve a CONSTITUTIONAL term of four years.

So what is Senator Blockhead up to? Well not long ago the Blockhead called a press conference to announce he had nothing to announce about his decision to run for president. Hmm, that tells us that not only is he a Blockhead; he’s a delusional Blockhead.

So how better to jump start a presidential campaign than to get headlines across America. Blockhead tried the non-announcement announcement and the MSM laughed at him and rightfully questioned his intelligence. So Blockhead gathered his top political advisors, Larry, Curly and Moe, and special constitutional advisor Carrot Top. After careless consideration, Blockhead decided that to say the president may be impeached. This was only after the law firm of Laurel and Hardy warned him against calling for the president’s assassination. “You can always use that line later if the impeachment line fails to get you headlines”, Hardy advised. Low and behold, after mentioning the “I” word, Senator Blockhead is now a MSM darling.

Senator Hagel has evolved on this page from Senator Hagel, to Senator Box of Rocks, to Senator Blockhead. Those references give him way too much intellectual credit. From now and forever more he will be known on this page as Senator Wedge. The wedge is the simplest tool known to man. And it seems Senator Wedge is the simplest man known to man.