What did we learn from lying tax cheat Tom Daschle stepping aside as HHS Sec in waiting? Well you might think that we learned that there’s no room for lying tax cheats in positions of great responsibility within the Dear Leader’s administration. You’d be wrong. We have confirmed a confirmed lying tax cheat as Sec of Treasury.
What we learned is that you must be the FIRST lying tax cheat to step forward. Had Daschle stepped up FIRST and said, “How was I supposed to know that my Limo and chauffeur cost money? I only made 5 million a year since leaving government. I thought everyone had limos and chauffeurs – except Limo drivers of course. They’d have to work something among themselves to get around on their days off. Besides, this tax code is an abomination that make’s it impossible for an honest guy like me to make a good faith effort to pay my taxes.” Had he said that, he’d have probably gotten over and Tim - taxes? what taxes? - Geithner would be left to pull the plug on himself admitting once and for all that while he is the only man smart enough to get us out of the current worldwide financial calamity, he’s not bright enough to figure out the American tax code or use Turbo Tax.
Then there’s the case of this Kilifer chick who was set to take some made up Orwellian job as the Fraud and Abuse Redistribution Czarina and Enforcer or FARCE for short. This poor gal had no chance. Not only was she was beaten out of the blocks admitting that she was a lying tax cheat that had no clue how the American tax system works but she was beaten out of the blocks by not one but two good ol’ boys.
Then the coup de gras, her problem involved payments to not one but two nannies to care for – get this – her teenaged children. No, there’s no chance those kids will be living in mom’s basement well into their 40s. Two nannies for two teenagers? What the...? I assume they are potty trained. But being raised as Libs, who knows.
So, this is a valuable lesson here, anytime you have a tax problem be the first to admit it, but if it involves a “nanny,” just go ahead and quit. America doesn’t mind if a lying tax cheat is running the agency responsible for catching lying tax cheats, but it will not stand for another nannygate.
1 comment:
Okay Lex, you got me started. I have federal income tax, state income tax, local income tax, school tax, property tax, business tax, social security tax, medicare/medicaid tax, state sales tax, gasoline tax, workman comp tax, and I am sure some other taxes I cannot recall right now. As I attempt to follow-the-money, I see the feds will be loaning our tax dollars, that they borrowed from Outer Mongolia, to cities and states to make up the differences that they cannot meet because the cities and states will be overspending. Which means we take our tax payments from our right pants pocket, shift it to our left pocket, then take it out and send it...somewhere. In the meantime I have to pay interest on that money, that the feds/state borrowed on my behalf to buy sod for a park in Wash DC and a new wetlands down the road, that will breed more friggin geese(that will s*** in my yard and on nearby golf courses)in the years ahead. Like a moth to a flame, the same people that voted/lobbied/got drivers and limos to twist legislation and gain power in government via handing out $100 bills like drunk uncles at Christmas, are crying into microphones about their mistakes in not knowing what taxes they owe. Hell they set all leghold traps in the room then broke all the light bulbs! Al Capone got eleven years in a prison cell for not paying his taxes but what if he said that he was the only one that could brew acceptable beer in all of Chicago? Would they have made him the Potentate-Czar and High Lord of the FDA? Was Daschle so upset about his reputation? Hell no! He is crying because the largest hog troff (probably misspelled but don't slow me down now) in the entire history of the world is about to be opened and he looking through the fence. To begin reversing this insanity I am forming the Griffin Rebel Force (GRF). Our goal is to create chaos between the state and fed gov'ts. Our first act is this. The City of Columbus has decided to raise the fine for parking in a handicap zone to $500. The Federal Disabilities Act requires acres of available parking for those that can get a handicapped sticker. By the way this is as difficult as finding a plastic Chinese trinket in a box of Cracker Jacks. The GRF will be stealing state owned vehicles at night, which were purchased in a sweethart deal by the State Czar of New Car Swindles, and parking them in these set aside parking spots. We beleive we can generate a shooting war between state and feds. If we get caught we know we are paying top dollars for government sponsored housing/jail cells that we can utilize. Our day passes allow us to keep our jobs. Of course we will not pay our taxes making us eligle for a high paying government job and will be able tp send our kids to the same school as Obama's kids. We suspect by adding fuel/other GRF acts to the mix we rule ala Pinky and the Brain. I am heading to the bedrooms to remove all the "do not remove" tags off the mattresses. I have solace in knowing that all my actions are as logical as our political leaders. They aren't the only ones that can get a state sponsored labotomy and run for governor of Illinois!
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