Wednesday, March 01, 2006

CBS poll goofier than the National Guard papers

CBS has published a poll so fraught with error that even Dan Rather and Mary Mapes are skeptical. The poll, which over samples DemoRATS and asks dopey questions, like, “If George Bush killed your dog with a shotgun in a hunting ‘accident’, would you still rightly and logically hate him?” Not surprisingly, the poll found Bush’s support among those predisposed to hating him plummeted to 34%.

Cheney’s number fell to 18%, which made W. feel pretty good. Bush reportedly said to long time aide Karl Rove, “Hee, hee, well I guess I look pretty good compared to ol’ shotgun Dick.” Cheney quipped to his aide, “Well, I didn’t think George was going to bring me back for the third term after the shotgun thing anyway, but this pretty much seals the deal.”

Disappointing the MSM and RATS everywhere, Bush refused to resign or throw himself from a tall building in the face of the low numbers. During an interview with CBS wannbe ABC, when asked about the poll, Bush was defiant (Warning, this is an accurate quote), “If I worried about polls, I would be — I wouldn't be doing my job. And, look, I fully understand that when you do hard things, it creates consternation at times. And, you know, I've been up in the polls, and I've been down in the polls. You know, it's just part of life in the modern era.

“I think the American people — I know the American people want somebody to stand on principle, decide, make decisions and stand by them, and to lead this world toward a more peaceful tomorrow. And I strongly believe we are doing that, and I'm — I got to tell you, I'm enjoying it. It's a fantastic opportunity.”

Upon hearing the president’s comment, the MSM and RATS everywhere were heard to let loose an audible “Curse you George Bush. Just quit and let Shrillery and Al run the country.”

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