Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Damn white men! They got over again.

Yesterday the Supreme Court ruled - narrowly 5 to 4 – that it was OK to be a white guy in America. After 233 years of keeping everyone else down many - like Supreme Court nominee Sotomayor whose dopey decision was overturned - were hoping that the court would finally admit that whitey was a no-good rotten rat; making it big by exploiting people of color, women, animals and the very planet we all rely on to survive.

This is the prism through which many of our fellow citizens will be viewing the holiday now about on us – the 4th of July. It is cliché now for many to talk with disdain about the “dead white guys” who founded this country. They might believe if any other group of people had landed here the result would have been much, much better. They are wrong.

They might believe if someone else had landed here we’d never have had a problem with the Indians. Oh sure, hug the coast don’t expand too much and everything would have been fine – right? Wrong the only way any other race could have avoided a problem with the Indians was not to settle.

And here’s a news flash to the phony Indian lovers like Ward Churchill. In the 1500-1700s the world was being colonized. And it wasn’t just the Europeans doing the colonization. Moroccan Muslims were colonizing much of Africa by force as early as 1590. Well at least they weren’t enslaving people – right? Wrong again my dear public school grad. Muslims have ALWAYS enslaved the people that they conquer.

The first big African slave traders were the – hold on to your hats for this – Moroccan Muslims. However Muslim countries have far fewer descendants from their nefarious slave trading past because Muslims castrated African slave victims. Gee, how utterly humane of them. They didn’t want another generation born into slavery.

How great would it have been if Moroccan Muslims waded ashore at Plymouth? They would have slaughtered the Indians; brought in castrated African slaves and not had to deal with all of that nasty civil rights stuff in the 60s.

Meanwhile America would be perpetually living in the 7th century. How quaint. No American Civil War. No “American century” leading the world in everything from medicine, transportation, space exploration, entertainment to war making - saving Europe and the world from itself twice in one century.

How great would it have been if only a few Muslims cold have mustered the courage to leave everything to sail into uncharted waters looking for a new slave trading route? That would have worked out better for everyone - except Indians, women, gays, Jews, Christians and blacks. Well, at least we ALL would have been slaves. But how can you have affirmative action when everyone has the same grievance?

And how does Africa always escape scrutiny when the conversation turns to “American” slavery? Afrikaners were the middlemen profiting the most from slave trade. Strong African tribes preyed on weaker tribes capturing and selling them to anyone with goods or money. The idea of Europeans pulling up on the coast, dashing into the jungle to capture a few hundred slaves on their native turf is fantasy.

The dirty little secret is that Africa was, IS and always has been the most deeply invested in slavery. If descendants of American slaves want to seek reparations, they ought to start with where the slave trade started – Africa.

The bottom line is that we ought not judge the 1700s by 2009 standards and Americans and the world ought to thank God everyday that the people who founded this country were who they were - white Christian men.

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