Well, it's finally here. The day that all government bureaucrats wait and hope for, April 15th tax day has arrived. Today is the day that a little over half (53%) of working Americans pay their taxes and half of tax-paying Demo-Dope high government officials lie, cheat and steal on their taxes.
Demo-Dope cheating has become so prevalent that Turbo Tax has a new edition out called Turbo Cheat. The ad goes something like this:
Are you tired of paying your fair share? If you are, and you are a Demo-Dope high government official, try Turbo Cheat. Turbo Cheat has a specially designed Demo-Dope tax cheat calculator that allows you to un-claim any service fees. That's right, Turbo Cheat allows you to "forget" about paying the nanny, maid, gardener, pool attendant and ehum "masseuse."
Get the Deluxe Tubo Cheat and "forget" about additional income from speaking fees, drug sales, prostitution income and "forgotten" property assets. The Super Deluxe Turbo Cheat has a charity calculator that actually allows you to make charitable contributions to yourself. If you are AlGore you can even buy carbon credits from yourself!
Remember, "talking about" the rich paying more in taxes is for Demo-Dopes. Actually paying higher taxes is for rich Republicans. Take Charlie Rangle's advise:
Voice over:
Turbo Cheat allowed me to eh uhm, "forget" to pay millions in taxes on foreigner property, local property, walking around money, gifts, unpaid parking fees and my House of Representatives bar bill. As the Chairman of the House Ways and Means Committee, I write the tax code. Turbo Cheat helps me to ignore it.
Narrator:
Only saps and losers pay their taxes. Take Charlie's advise and cheat your @$$ off with Turbo Cheat.
Disclaimer:
Turbo Cheat is a licensesed product of the Democrat National Committee. Copying this program or redistributing this product in any way without the the express written authorization of the DNC and without a maximum campaign contribution to the DNC can result in you being hauled before Henry Waxman's Committee for interrogation and intimidation.
Not all tax cheats get away with it. Some actually go to jail, but they are mostly Republicans. Protect yourself today. To ensure a favorable court case, make the maximum donation allowable under law to your local DNC office and local Demo-Dope candidates.
If you are busted, don't worry. It's probably a racist Republican hatchet job. ACORN lawyers will be provided to you free of charge by Turbo Cheat. In the worst case Chairman Rangle can write e new law retroactive to your case and get you off scott free.
If caught cheating, take Charlie Rangle and Tim Geithner's advise, lie. The most effective lines are:
- I'm not "cheating." I just forgot to claim my beach front property for the last 15 years.
- No shit, a driver and limo provided by the company should be treated as income? Who knew?
- What do you mean, taking the family to Disney World for a week can't be deducted as "child care?"
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