Iranians making the US look like the fools sent to negotiate with them

Anyone who has ever bought a car knows that the longer you stay at the dealership the less likely you are to get a good deal.  You have to be willing to walk away.  If you do, it won’t be three days before they call you to come back.

There’s a funny scene in a Spongebob Square Pants episode where Patrick is buying an old toilet plunger that Mr. Crabs is passing off as an antique soup ladle.  Mr. Crabs tells Patrick he wants $5 for the item.  Patrick looks in his wallet, pulls out all of his cash and says, “Aww, all I have is eight.”  Mr. Crabs snatches Patrick’s cash and says, “Sold!”  Leaving the sale Patrick says to himself, “Patrick Star, you are one smart shopper.” 

The Empty Suit is still trying to negotiate a nuclear deal with Iran.  He should have left the table months and months ago.  One reason the Iranians are happy to keep the talks going indefinitely is the US is paying them to stay at the negotiating table.  It’s nice work if can find someone stupid enough to pay you to do it.  It seems the Iranians found the perfect partner – TES.  TES will have paid the Iranians nearly 12 billion dollars to stay at the negotiating table by the time the talks end.  If they ever end.

And if you’re Iran why would you want them to end?  TES draws one “redline” after another and then retreats.  Marco Rubio said that he’s afraid if the negotiations go on much longer the way things are going he’s afraid TES will agree to build the bomb for the Iranians.   I don’t think TES will do that, but given his relationship with Netanyahu, he might agree to nuke Israel for the Iranians.

But not to worry.  One cave after another to greatest threat to Middle East peace is nothing to be alarmed about.  What could possibly go wrong?  TES has sent our own Patrick Star to negotiate with the Iranians.  I’m certain John Francois Kerry will get at least as good deal for the US as Patrick got for his toilet plunger antique soup ladle. And on the plane ride home, after giving away the farm and selling out America, Kerry will toast himself with glass of fine wine, "John Francois Kerry you are one savvy negotiator."

When TES brings home a horrible deal you can count on the fact that it’ll be secret OJ Boehner and McConnell will support it as the best deal that could possibly be made.  Remember this line, “Would you rather go to war with Iran” it be used on anyone who opposes the Iranian deal.  That and, “If you oppose TES on this deal. It is clear evidence that you are a racist.”

Sadly, you cannot make this $h!t up.